About keeping score

One thing we parents do obsess about is constantly testing our offspring to see how they measure up to other kids within the same age group. This “friendly” competition used to be quite contained to relatively small groups of friends and families. You could always rely on some smug relative commenting on the fact that his project reached a milestone a full week ahead of yours. “These things matter you know,” he’ll say. “She’s only two but by this time next year, we’ll be enrolling her to collage! She’s a genious like that kid on YourTubes!” (Yes, both misspellings were intentional)
While I’ve yet to meet a 5yo who can’t walk or talk (barring illness or birth defect!), it somehow seems crucial our kids start doing those things way ahead of schedule. I wonder why we’re less enthusiastic when our kids start dating at 15…
So the next time you get cornered like that, put on your best casual face and calmly retort with: “How wonderful! Ours just had his first beer.” and walk away.
Beats the hell out of “saved the rainforest”, “cured cancer” or “finished a new C++ compiler written entirely in javascript”.