Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Model / Reality Impendence Mismatch

As a newfangled dad, you’re blinded by idealistic visions. In these visions you see yourself teaching, guiding and building your child. Explaining things as you wish someone had explained them to you and revealing the secrets of nature as you have discovered them. You see your offspring sitting patiently, absorbing knowledge like a sponge. This is the Model.
As a newfangled dad, you’re faced with illuminating objectivity. Here you see yourself repeating lines (and mistakes?) your parents made and being bored to tears watching the episode of Teletubies for the umpth time. You see your child taking pleasure in deconstructing your (painstakingly glued and painted!) WWII model aircraft – deconstructing your Model. This is the Reality.
There are numerous schools of thought that pretend this impendence does not exist or that it is at least partially solved. You have your Attachment parenting, Balanced parenting, Christian parenting all the way to Quantum and Zen parenting. There are various commercial products (such as NAnny and They-Care) that purport to help you make the transition to model state completely transparent...
At the end of the day – it all depends on you. You are the system architect. It’s your job to make sure all deliverables are there on time. Be waterfall or be agile, but be there for your child. That’s all there is.

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